I'm sitting here, crying, as my 16 year old son reaches another milestone. My son is taking his driver's permit test right now, and I am remembering the day he was born. First babies can be tough to get out, and our son wasn't breathing when he was born. He was limp and blue, and the doctor rushed to bag him, trying to jump start his little lungs. I was so surprised to have a son first, and when I heard him cry for the first time it was the most amazing sound I had ever heard.
I remember when I lost our 2nd child to miscarriage. It was so hard to grieve while at the same time watching my then 15 month old boy learn about life. He was so funny. I would be grieving our loss at one moment, then laughing hysterically at our toddler at the next.
I miss the days of finding little boy treasures in his pant pockets. Instead of plastic spiders, Legos, rocks and gum, I now find money and schedules. It's strange to now have to literally look up into my son's eyes, as he is now taller than I am. But when I look deeply, I still see those eyes I have loved since he was a baby.
I cried when he was born. I cried when he outgrew "newborn" sleepers. I cried when he went to preschool, and now I am crying over a driver's permit test. I think the crying is a combination of sorrow and joy. Sorrow at stages gone by, joy in what a blessing this boy has been, and will continue to be. I wonder what the Lord has in store for him?
Go hug your little boys, because soon they will be men!
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